Category: Memoire

  • Rebuilding Rudy

    Rebuilding Rudy

    About my intimate relationship with a Volkswagen.

    Auto mechanical talents run through my genetic code almost as consistently as big noses. My father’s side comes from the Oil City area of Pennsylvania, so named for being the epicenter of the oil boom in America. My mother was born in Detroit. We are always one degree of separation to an autoworker.

    Shekell Moving Co. First Motor Truck

    My great-great grandfather stakes claim to having introduced the first motorized moving truck in Detroit, upgrading from a horse drawn trailer for his Shekell Moving Company. My father’s brother is 75 and winning amateur car races at the Tucson Speedway, with his own machine shop bearing the official sponsorship.

    My father can drive a car so that it will run 300,000 miles. Somehow even the interiors remain intact. I think he keeps his vehicles together with psychic will and steady routine. That shows an inherent understanding for the car, but using his hands as a technician, that is quite another thing. Truth is he can barely turn a wrench.

    The genetic material could not stop itself in me, although I turned out more like my father, an artist. Like him, I love making music and writing, and yet I find myself rebuilding motors too.

    Since high school, I’ve been working on my own cars. Gradually, I have drawn down my reliance on other people to repair them, taking on more complex maintenance over time. There was one project that lifted me to the next level: Rudy the Dasher, a 1977 Volkswagen Dasher 2-door Coupe.

    We were fortunate enough to be together, the car, Kate and I, during the full solar eclipse of 2017.

    This car was given to me by a good friend, Tony, because it was stuck in his driveway. The classic, but forgotten, VW was his grandfather’s, inherited by his father, then given to him, then given to me. I was honored. Tony just wanted to see the car running again. He tried to maintain it for a while, but it just kept breaking down.

    Our mutual friend Doug was our mechanic. He’s also a musician, a multi-instrumentalist in the jazz tradition. I took private piano lessons from him in college. He is a true renaissance man, capable of almost anything. He has always been there to help me on car projects, whether or not I was broke. It was natural to ask him if he would help me with it.

    First thing was getting it out of Tony’s driveway. I was living in an apartment downtown, so I asked my new-at-the-time-girlfriend, Kate, if I could tow it to her house and work on it there. She kept the housemates at bay, but I had to work in the street. I found a cheap Craigslist tow driver for 50 bucks and that was that.

    Second thing was to clean it out. It was taking on water thanks to dry rotted gaskets around the glass. It was molding all through the interior. Luckily, it was almost completely surface level, and the rust had not yet eaten through anything. Kate helped and we got it clean.

    The more I learned about the Dasher, I couldn’t understand how dime-a-dozen VW bugs were so valuable to auto collectors, while this unique, historic car was totally ignored by them. It was the first modern car by VW, introduced in 1974, it is actually the Passat — Dasher is the American model name. 

    Even in mint condition, this Dasher would not sell for as much as a bus, bug, or Ghia, in poor condition. So it was a labor of love, because I thought this car was too cool to be junked.

    After cleaning it out, I had to get it to run. You have air, spark, and fuel. When you are starting from scratch, you have to troubleshoot everything. And it turned out everything was wrong.

    Read into the deeper technical stuff on my portfolio page here. See an archive post in which I look to Rudy as a case study in the true environmental impact of cars and the importance of maintaining them. Kate even wrote a poem dedicated to the car, also for THRU.

    Kate and myself out on a swimming excursion, with Rudy, July 2015.

    We named it Rudy. I gave it a full name: Rudolph Spirit Walton. Let’s break that down. Rudy because it is an underdog, like the football film Rudy. Rudolph honors the reindeer, because VW collectors have been snubbing it from their reindeer games (irony that its factory name is Dasher, I know). Spirit because in Portland, “Spirit of 77” refers to the only year the Portland Trailblazers won the NBA Finals (against Philadelphia). Walton because Bill Walton was MVP that year.

    Once it was running, I just kept working on it. For almost three years, this remained my daily driver. When it was tuned up, even with its flaws, it had a glide to it. My favorite was to drive in the farmlands over the Northwest hills of Portland, all connected to Skyline Boulevard.

    Skyline is an old residential highway tracking the summit of the mountain dividing Portland from her western suburbs. With rack and pinion steering, you turned the wheel with the road in a way that feels one with its curves, accelerating and coasting in third gear gave just enough range to make most turns without downshifting.

    It didn’t have fast acceleration with 84 horsepower, but it had smooth acceleration and would build momentum, getting from zero to 60 faster by the moment. The motor has a Porsche-like growl about it. It was marketed as a luxury car and it felt like one, despite the cracks in the dashboard and flickering lights.

    Problems were always popping up. It became a part-time job that wasn’t paying off. Kate was beginning to lose patience with it, and with me, by late 2015. That was a rough year in general, and it cost me so much time, money, and energy, that it seemed foolish to go on with it. I tried to sell it, but its title was stolen out of our storage locker and I couldn’t afford to replace it. Really, that year was traumatic on the whole.

    Kate got photos of me doing the brake overhaul. Photo by Kathleen Dolan.

    We survived it. Relationships are difficult but we got through, things were looking pretty good, then in 2016, the motor crapped out. It just wouldn’t start. I did a compression test and it failed. Not sure what to do, I found a junky old Ford Ranger for $500 and I grabbed it. Ended up selling it broken down on the side of the road for half that a month later. My name and date was never put on the title, so it was worth it because I needed the truck to take on jobs.

    I decided to rebuild the Volkswagen. It had made it down to the hill to the barn before it stopped starting. Better there than the street, but challenging nonetheless. I had to bring the motor to Doug’s warehouse, then commute to his place every day until it was finished. Tony let me borrow his truck to transport the motor back and forth.

    While I had the chance back at the barn, I pulled every last part from under the hood, inspected, repaired, or replaced what was needed, and scrubbed it down. By the time we finished the motor and put it back in, it was almost totally mechanically restored.

    Using a sleeve, we safely drop pistons into their chambers. Photo by Kathleen Dolan.

    As you might expect, it felt better to drive than ever. I got a taste of what it felt like to drive that car new off the lot. And I think it is a swell drive.

    I probably enjoyed a few months of trouble free driving before the next wave of mysterious issues would surface, and I would just keep myself busy resolving them.

    Some time in early 2017, Kate and I decided to move out of Portland. So it just made sense to sell it and buy a truck, or van. I found a vintage Ford F-150 on Craigslist for just $700. You don’t get one of those for that price without problems. So I started all over again.

    Rudy was listed on eBay because I figured there had to be someone in North America looking for a Dasher. Locally, I just got lowballed. I was right. Someone in Idaho bought it, he said he drove a Dasher in college. So I took Tony and his girlfriend together in the backseat on a drive along Skyline Boulevard, at sunset on a summer night, to give him some closure on the project. 

    Two days later, Rudy was on the freight truck. Meanwhile, I was already working on my new truck, Harriet, to ensure she would make it to Tucson. Little did I know that I was driving a motor that technically should not have been running. I’ll have to save that story for another day.

    Sunset at Skyline cemetery August 2017.
  • From Farm to Stable

    From Farm to Stable

    The rise and fall of The Point.

    Through the summer of 2012, I was living in a tent on a farm. It was great. I had rented a house on that farm years before. But this time, I was trying out tent life. I loved it. I’ll some day devote a full story to it.

    The opportunity came to rent a house just in time to avoid October rains. Portland’s climate is kind of abrupt. You can have damn near zero rains between July 1 and September 1, but really, it just begins dumping rain by the end of September and it is relentless. My tent was protected by roped up tarps, which is good for a day or two, but without drainage, the ground eventually turns to mud.

    This house (not the tent) was in the same neighborhood that I had been organizing music festivals for years, in St. Johns (near the tent). The landlord needed someone to recover damages from his previous tenants, the neighborhood party animals. He let his house get wrecked for years, without checking on the condition of it. He was chill like that.

    Freshly pitched tent with canopy. The kitchen would go to the left.

    My situation also demanded that I keep a commercial office for my newly expanded non-profit, InterArts, as we had just taken on the Cathedral Park Jazz Festival, successfully completing the 2012 season. A work-live situation would be the most efficient way to keep me on the job for no pay. It would turn out not to be enough.

    Anisha Scanlon is the person that brought the opportunity to me. She wanted an office for her own purposes. She had no money, but I was doing okay, at the time. This was a moment of mutual opportunity. She depended on me, I depended on her, so we just went for it. Anisha picked up the lead to get in the property. We all knew the previous tenants, but it was the neighbor that wanted us in there. The property included two homes, so we shared landlords with the neighbor — in fact we shared backyards.

    Our mutual friend Todd Guess, at that time unemployed, was hustling his permaculture training and design skills, so he looked at this as an opportunity to consult us through it as part of his portfolio. Other community members joined us in providing materials and labor until we pulled off a minor miracle.

    We managed to fully repaint the exterior of the house in October, and finish landscaping within November, as we had an unusually dry season, followed by a soaking wet winter. We shifted to the interior in the knick of time.

    See more of The Point on my portfolio page.

    This project significantly educated me on home construction and maintenance. This was not quite a remodel, but close to it. We painted everywhere, repaired or replaced kitchen and bath facilities, added new electrical circuits, and more. From the top down, we finished the whole job out with new flooring.

    Once everything was done, I got to flesh it out with an art gallery, a complete office and multimedia suite, and workspace for up to six individuals comfortably in the offices.

    The grand opening party went off well, I really believed that it was going to continue to go well. One problem began that I didn’t have time to curate the gallery and we did not gain traction to utilizing the house for revenue.

    The fate of my non-profit hinged on a filing error that causes, according to an obscure detail in the Pension Protection Act, automatic revocation of federal 501(c)(3) status. Not an irredeemable mistake, but it was the straw that broke this camel’s back. It would cost us however much time would be involved with filing a new application, plus the $400 fee.

    I was tortured with technical non-profit law and all the mumbo jumbo that goes on in the whole non-profit administration field, including professional backstabbing, cut throat competition, popularity contents and all that. I have more memories than I care to recall of supposedly compassionate liberals scrambling all over one another for position at some non-profit corporation. Gross.

    That year, I organized for a work travel visa for the Brazilian group Ventura Trio, but the State Department delayed the application until they missed their flight. I worked 16-hour days for the full two weeks leading into and including the Cathedral Park Jazz Festival, in 2013, only to have one of my headliners cock blocked by a hegemonic immigration policy. Literally within the same month, the IRS revoked our tax exempt status. I was beyond stressed out. No pay.

    The way you get your executive leadership (that’s me) paid is to invite wealthy people to your Board of Directors. I required only a $25 membership fee, very low compared to most organizations. Members could waive that fee with, I think, 12 hours of volunteer time. So I attracted other poor folks to the Board.

    InterArts put on No.Fest 2008 through 2011. We split, that is Jeffrey Helwig took over No.Fest in 2012 and I absorbed Cathedral Park Jazz Festival. I ran that for two years. Revenue went year over year roughly like this: $200 (08) $2000 (09) $2500 (10) $4000 (11) $23,000 (12) $32,000 (13). While I gradually increased the office budget, and I slept in my office, I never paid myself a check. I would survive an audit. But it was precarious. Fortunately, I could legally sleep in my office at The Point. It was a huge step up.

    There is leadership potential in me, but I write here in this blog openly about my flaws. There is a pathology to it, a history that makes sense of my erratic patterns of mixed success. I have this dual edge, I can only pull off the persona rich people want from me for so long until I crack. I really can’t do it. Most people I meet are fully compartmentalized. I never could do that. So I never got funding to pay any staff beyond event-based contracting. By the way, I earned a RACC grant in 2013 to pay $10,000 to musicians at CPJazz.

    That September, I did my annual deep dive into contemporary art and performance via PICA’s T:BA Festival. I had been contributing media since 2008. It was such a nice break from producing events, rather I got to be the commentary, the observer, the journalist. I was feeling a longing to take back my role as a creative person, not an administrator. And I wanted to expand on my long-lived role in media. I found myself emotionally resolved to dissolve InterArts.

    Rather than keep the house, or slog through IRS filings to keep my non-profit, I just gave everything up. This sealed my reputation among a certain group that I was prone to overheat and burn out. It was true — but it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy when those same people do nothing to support you if not directly oppose you. I left town for several months, coming back to start a whole new project, turning away from St. Johns, as for me it was scorched earth.

    So that is the rise and fall of the The Point. I’ll tell you what, it led to a whole new collection of adventures. After selling all my unneeded stuff, and working out a sudden exit with the landlord, as InterArts had ran its budget and I couldn’t afford the whole house, I embarked on a long form version of my annual holiday season travel through California to Tucson.

    It looked like the best planning I had ever given to a trip, but I returned flat broke, without the car I left with, had been investigated by some kind of law enforcement, and a drum set that comedian Andrew Michaan eventually transported to me, for nothing, because I’m a bum. I crashed on the floor of my good friends’ art party house until I found a room for rent.

    This next period of my life I regard as the THRU period, where I embarked on the ludicrous project of starting up a media company. Not that the idea was ludicrous, but my capacity to do it was not compatible to the idea. I was ahead of myself. Start from where you are. That is how The Point happened. It was successful. I let it go. Chaos ensued.

    I see how this pattern works now. The universe arranges itself toward your intentions, but when you abruptly change those intentions, it pushes back. It has to fully reorient you within its system even though you are a disoriented person feeding it confused intentions. At least that is how I look at it.